lanie

its 1:39

2006-06-29T05:53:12Z

i cant sleep and im bored outta my mind so i decided to write a livejournal entry. pretty cool right? summer has been pretty good recently. i have bought way too many clothes and today i have promised myself i am not going to buy any more. im still working on growing my hair out, its getting really long and i cant wait til i can braid it into long loose pigtails. i have also decided to try to cut back on smoking, i really dont want to keep this stupid habit for long. i quit my stupid job at mellow mushroom. fuck stupid retarded bitches that manage to STILL have a job as a server and also be forty years old. its so funny because if i ever came into contact with josh or jonnie in public i actually think i would spit on them, and i never think about stuff like that usually.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyways

i have pretty much devoted my time to being a housewife, i now wash henrys clothes and vaccuum and call my friends during the day to gossip. i swear im channeling a 32 year old soccer mom deep down. i actually used the word "brunch" the other day. amazing. but honestly, the best feeling in the world is having a nice clean apartment and henry coming home and telling me how nice the place looks. in other news, its so damn hot outside and i want to go swimming, but not in our apartment pool. im definately afraid to be in the water there. me and elise are still planning to go to the lake sometime soon. i have to throw her a huge party for her going away to college thingy. anyways, im off to try to make an attempt to go to sleep and finish watching three men and a baby. coooool.

laniechaves @ 2006-04-25T23:52:00

2006-04-26T04:15:42Z

ahhh! my birthday is in 10 days! i am going to six flags & then going to the cheesecake factory and and and hopefully getting some awesome presents! and me and elise are planning to go to the BEACH later in the summer! yay!!!

on a sadder note, i have to work lunch tomorrow. sucks. i get paid on friday, lets hope its a big fat check so i can do some more work on my sleevey poo. i also have all the rest of my tattoos planned out so i can finish them and be done!!! sweet!

laniechaves @ 2006-04-12T21:45:00

2006-04-13T01:46:02Z

i hate my body
i hate my body
i hate my body
i hate my body
i hate my body
i hate my body
i hate my body

no matter how much weight i lose, i will still look awkward as fuck in clothes.

laniechaves @ 2006-04-05T23:57:00

2006-04-06T03:58:15Z

I!!!!!!!!!!
am going to nine inch nails june 7th!
and getting a sleeve in 2 weeks

laniechaves @ 2006-03-08T13:45:00

2006-03-08T18:59:04Z

i always update my livejournal when im bored or waiting on something. In this case im waiting on Henry to come home from his new job, which is carmax. hes a detailer type person, which means he pretty much works on cars to restore them back to their original appearance. he will be making some killer money and pretty much be able to pay for the apartment by himself. but that doesnt mean im quitting my job, i really like having my own money. me elise and henry are also planning another road trip in july to conneticut, it should be so much fun. ive still been going to the gym, and ive lost 10 pounds. size 14 whats up. im still working really hard to lose more, im planning on keeping my size at a 10/12, which is still a little ways away, but im glad improvements are showing up. other than that ive been keeping busy with working and fixing up me and henrys room. ikea is my new favorite place to shop. i take out my not-being-able-to-shop-for-clothing rage on shoes and ikea. water, diet coke, or minute maid light lemonade is all i drink now. i splurge on food pretty much once a week, and then i feel like a fatty. monday was my chicken wings, cheese sticks, beer, and ice cream night. which will never be all together again, by the way. unless i wanna have a heart attack when im 19. im also planning on quitting smoking sometime. i dont know when, but i know i definately should. me, elise and my mom tried quitting, but we failed. im sure we'll try again sometime soon. anyways, on that note, time to have a smoke. peace!

sweet!

2006-02-14T19:49:32Z

happy valentines day!
i moved in a new apartment. me and elise joined a gym and have been taking yoga classes, ive already lost 5 pounds. my body is so sore i cant hardly stand it, but i love it. i have to work tonight but i only stay for three hours, which is good because closing is such a bust, i always smell like pizza and pine sol when i get out. These are things i am looking forward to:

not being sore anymore
losing more weight
my hair getting longer than it already is
getting more tattoos

everything has really been going well for me other than that. im really glad me and elise have started going to the gym. its ten times more positive if you have someone that can motivate you and that you can laugh with. and henry is planning on joining the same gym so all three of us can work out together, which will be so much fun. i also have a newfound love for the olympics. all in all, things are really really good.

laniechaves @ 2005-12-03T15:07:00

2005-12-03T20:15:06Z

its been so long since ive updated this thing, but what the hell. alot of things have been going on recently, dave moved out yessssss, i love my job, i love my new friends and i love my life. i'm maturing so much as a person and its an awesome feeling. florida with elise and henry is 12 days away and im so excited. south america and me getting married is coming up soon, too. its going to be the best. everything is changing around me and its the most comforting feeling ever. the new paris hilton song is awesome, too, btw.

laniechaves @ 2005-07-23T22:27:00

2005-07-24T02:31:04Z

so im not even half as mad as i was before. much better actually. i still am in a wreck of a mood half the time. but what can ya do. after some shopping, venting, and laughing i feel better than before. i want fall to come more than anything. i want to break out my jackets and go out for hot tea and watch the leaves turn. i am actually starting to miss school. but then again, i dont want summer to end. i love staying up til the buttcrack of dawn every night and the hot sticky midnight weather. i actually watched the sun come up the other day. it was amazing. anyways, tomorrow i am most likely going to see my cousins, which is exciting. i also want to see the devils rejects with henry soon. awesome dudes. peace!

laniechaves @ 2005-07-20T12:49:00

2005-07-20T16:51:56Z

i hate getting yelled at day in and day out. its like the person that im suppose to get the most support from is the person that tears me down all the time. and when i try to calmly ask him to stop yelling all i get is more fucking screaming. seriously what the fuck?!?!?!?!? does he not fucking know all hes doing is hurting me when he does this shit to me? im fucking sick of it!!! i do so much shit for him its unfathomable, i make his fucking dinner, make his fucking breakfast, clean his fucking clothes, get his outfit fucking ready for him and what do i get? i get FUCKING SHIT. FUCK THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW, ive done so much over the past almost three years to clean myself up for him, quit doing shit, and become a better person, at least i let him know i love him. i cant even get that shit from him anymore, what the fuck. i know im letting off a shitload of steam, so ill probably regret this later.

cute face little waist but a big behind

2005-07-01T03:46:42Z

so i havent written in this shit in a longgg time. but im happy. very happy. i feel like ive been given a clean slate. and its really awesome. but my eyes are dry, which is no good. ive been tanning like crazy lately, which is cool. the only bad thing that has happened is our washer keeps leaking. sucky. oh well, not much else to write about, except life being great. peace out!

laniechaves @ 2005-06-07T14:16:00

2005-06-07T18:15:43Z

seriously......

HATE

laniechaves @ 2005-05-31T11:20:00

2005-05-31T15:22:12Z

today should be fun. hanging out with elise, getting some hairdye hopefully, and just hanging out. i need to get out of here for a little bit anyways. haha by the way laine fisher is amazing. she laughs when i tell her super creepy stories intended to creep her out. im loving life right now.

laniechaves @ 2005-05-20T22:27:00

2005-05-21T02:32:19Z

i just came back from one of the most incredible nights of my life. i saw all of the people that i went to killian hill with since kindergarden. and i have to say my love for all of them hasnt changed one bit. i have so much pride for each and every one of them my heart is about to bust. i love them, so much its crazy. and i wished every single one of them an incredible journey into college and adulthood. all of me wished i would have stayed at that christian school and graduated with them. but my friend joel told me that God has a plan for me, thats why things have become the way they are. i am ecstatic i got to see everyone and tell them goodbye tonight, and i am now so happy that i got to see what they have become.

laniechaves @ 2005-05-18T21:21:00

2005-05-19T01:26:10Z

ITS SUMMER! im so excited. alot of my friends are going to college, or getting into their careers. and to be honest, everytime i think of it my heart stings a little. im happy for them, but a part of me is devestated that im still left behind. i get a little teary eyed thinking of my friends from summer school and killian hill graduating and growing up, ive known all of them since kindergarden. and now they're just like me, grown up and ready to start their lives. i hope i can go to the killian hill graduation. i know i will cry. oh well, this entry just took a turn for the worst, i think i better quit while im ahead. peace out!

this will seriously make you re-think your life

2005-05-12T05:16:36Z

Letter from SS-Untersturmführer Rascher to Reichsführer-SS Himmler, April 5, 1942. (Trials of War Criminals Before the Nuremberg Military Tribunals - Washington, U.S Govt. Print. Off., 1949-1953, Vol. I, p. 144-147):

"Highly esteemed Reich Leader:
Enclosed is an interim report on the low-pressure experiments so far conducted in the concentration camp of Dachau ...

Only continuous experiments at altitudes higher than 10.5 Km resulted in death. These experiments showed that breathing stopped after about 30 minutes, while in two cases the electrocardiographically charted action of the heart continued for another 20 minutes.

The third experiment of this type took such an extraordinary course that I called an SS physician of the camp as a witness, since I had worked on these experiments all by myself. It was a continuous experiment without oxygen at a height of 12 Km. conducted on a 37-year old Jew in good general condition. Breathing continued up to 30 minutes. After 4 minutes the experimental subject began to perspire and to wiggle his head, after 5 minutes cramps occurred, between 6 and 10 minutes breathing increased in speed and the experimental subject became unconscious; from 11 to 30 minutes breathing slowed down to three breaths per minute, finally stopping altogether.

Severest cyanosis developed in between and foam appeared at the mouth...

Autopsy report

One hour later after breathing had stopped, the spinal marrow was completely severed and the brain was removed. Thereupon the action of the auricle stopped for 40 seconds. In then renewed its action, coming to a complete standstill 8 minutes later. A heavy sub archnoid oedema was found in the brain. In the veins and arteries of the brain a considerable quantity of air was discovered."

Report by SS-Untersturmführer Rascher about cooling experiments in Dachau, September 10, 1942. ( Trials of War Criminals Before the Nuremberg Military Tribunals - Washington, U.S Govt. Print. Off., 1949-1953, Vol. I, p. 220):

"The experimental subjects were placed in the water, dressed in complete flying uniform, winter or summer combination, and with an aviator's helmet. A life jacket made out of rubber kapok was to prevent submerging. The experiments were carried out at water temperatures varying from from 2.5 to 12 Centigrade. In one experimental series, the occiput (brain stem) protruded above the water, while in another series of experiments the occiput (brain stem) and back of the head were submerged in water.

Electrical measurements gave low temperature readings of 26.4 in the stomach and 26.5 in the rectum. Fatalities occurred only when the brain stem and the back of the head were also chilled. Autopsies of of such fatal cases always revealed large amounts of free blood, up to one-half litter, in the cranial cavity."

The number of children killed by Hitler and his Nazis is not fathomable and full statistics for the tragic fate of the children will never be known. Estimates range as high as 1.5 million murdered children.

You find a few of them here - but there are no happy endings. The children were all murdered in Auschwitz.

Like little Georges Halpern, who was being sheltered with other children in The Children's Home in Izieu in the hope that the Nazis would not find them. The little boy wrote to his mother:

"Chere Maman, I send you 10000000000 kisses. Your son who loves you very much. There are big mountains and the village is very pretty. There are a lot of farms and we look for blackberries and raspberries and white mulberries. I hug you with all my heart. Georgy."

Liliane Gerenstein who wrote a letter to God before she was sent to her death:

"God? How good You are, how kind and if one had to count the number of goodnesses and kindnesses You have done, one would never finish.

God? It is You who command. It is You who are justice, it is You who reward the good and punish the evil.

God? It is thanks to You that I had a beautiful life before, that I was spoiled, that I had lovely things that others do not have.

God? After that, I ask You one thing only: Make my parents come back, my poor parents protect them (even more than You protect me) so that I can see them again as soon as possible.

Make them come back again. Ah! I had such a good mother and such a good father! I have such faith in You and I thank You in advance."

On the morning of April 6, 1944, as the children all settled down in the refectory to drink hot chocolate, the Nazis raided the Home, throwing the crying and terrified children on to the trucks like sacks of potatoes.

The children were all deported to Auschwitz and killed ..

Medical Experiments

High-Altitude Experiments
to investigate the limits of human endurance and existence at extremely high altitudes. The victims were placed in the low-pressure chamber and thereafter the simulated altitude therein was raised. Many victims died as a result of these experiments and others suffered grave injury, torture, and ill-treatment.

Incendiary Bomb Experiments
to test the effect of various pharmaceutical preparations on phosphorous burns. These burns were inflicted on the victims with phosphorous matter taken from incendiary bombs, and caused severe pain, suffering, and serious bodily injury.

Freezing Experiments
to investigate the most effective means of treating persons who had been severely chilled or frozen. The victims were forced to remain in a tank of ice water for up to 3 hours. Extreme rigor developed in a short time. Numerous victims died in the course of these experiments. After the survivors were severely chilled, rewarming was attempted by various means. In another series of experiments, the victims were kept naked outdoors for many hours at temperatures below freezing. The victims screamed with pain as their bodies froze.

Sea-water Experiments
to study various methods of making sea water drinkable. The victims were deprived of all food and given only chemically processed sea water. Such experiments caused great pain and suffering and resulted in serious bodily injury to the victims.

Malaria Experiments
to investigate immunization for and treatment of malaria. The victims were infected by mosquitoes or by injections of extracts of the mucous glands of mosquitoes. After having contracted malaria the victims were treated with various drugs to test their relative efficacy. Over 1,000 victims were used in these experiments. Many died and others suffered severe pain and permanent disability.

Mustard Gas Experiments
to investigate the most effective treatment of wounds caused by Mustard gas. Wounds deliberately inflicted on the victims were infected with Mustard gas. Some of the victims died as a result of these experiments and others suffered intense pain and injury.

Sulfanilamide Experiments
to investigate the effectiveness of sulfanilamide. Wounds deliberately inflicted on the victims were infected with bacteria such as streptococcus, gas gangrene, and tetanus. Circulation of blood was interrupted by tying off blood vessels at both ends of the wound to create a condition similar to that of a battlefield wound. Infection was aggravated by forcing wood shavings and ground glass into the wounds. The infection was treated with sulfanilamide and other drugs to determine their effectiveness. Many victims died as a result of these experiments and others suffered serious injury and intense agony.

Spotted Fever (Typhus) Experiments
to investigate the effectiveness of spotted fever and other vaccines. Numerous victims were deliberately infected with spotted fever virus in order to keep the virus alive - over 90 percent of the victims died as a result.

Experiments with Poison
to investigate the effect of various poisons upon human beings. The poisons were secretly administered to the victims in their food. The victims died as a result of the poison or were killed immediately in order to permit autopsies. In or about September 1944 the victims were shot with poison bullets and suffered torture and death

this is the most horrifying thing i have ever read in my life. six million lives. six million beating hearts. six million personalities. gone, just like that. I thank God im alive. From now on, I am going to be greatful for every single breath I take and never regret a single moment in my entire life & being.

laniechaves @ 2005-05-09T10:44:00

2005-05-09T14:47:13Z

today henry is picking me up for dinner and we are doing a late birthday celebration. exciting! i got my monroe done last night, i realy like it. i accidently fell asleep on the floor and dave had to drag me to bed. and now i have rug burn on my back. nice. buuuut anyways, i made empanadas for spanish food day, i hope people like them. oh well, peace out!
<3lc

laniechaves @ 2005-04-28T02:13:00

2005-04-28T06:20:52Z

tomorrrow is thursday. thank the lord. i am tired and my birthday is soon. im planning on just going out to eat. nothing crazy, nothing fancy. stephanie rhodes is taking me out to eat next thursday. im excited. i have this weird red mark on the side of my lip. me and dave argue alot. it sucks & i want it to stop. i want some cute clothes for my birthday. henrys parents are moving down on the 3rd. im nervous and im going to bed so night.
dead gerbils and goodwishes,
L.C.<3

laniechaves @ 2005-04-26T12:06:00

2005-04-26T16:13:14Z

i just woke up a little while ago and i am so tired i cant even think straight. i need to get to bed earlier and stop trying to make henry go to bed at the same time. i love the feeling of sticking up for myself and not having to deal with anyones bullshit. im on this kick now that if i dont want to hang out with someone, i wont do it. fuck hurting other people's feelings, i just want to concentrate on the things that are important to me right now. on the other hand, i dyed my hair dark brown. tiiiight.

i love my school now.
i love laine.
i love my boyfriend.
and i love the new budweiser select. gotta get some more of that.
<3333

laniechaves @ 2005-04-21T00:41:00

2005-04-21T04:52:52Z

so today was 420 and i didnt smoke haha. i think today was the first 420 that i didnt smoke in a long time. kudos to me. i hate it when people are like "OH MY GOD WHOEVER thinks 420 is cool is retarded!" its their own decision in whether or not they want do do that stuff. and i dont think anyone at all has the right to judge. but whatever. im still debating on whether or not to get those shoes this week. i know ill be purchasing them sometime soon, but whether or not i purchase them this week is unknown. anyways. im probably piercing my nose again this saturday. which is tight. school is fun again. except for the fact that i have to be there by 12:30 tomorrow. not cool. i need to get a tan. and no lotions either, too streaky.

life is pretty good right now.

laniechaves @ 2005-04-16T11:10:00

2005-04-16T15:14:52Z

whats up being awake at 11:00! so im feeling really good nowadays, i went to little five yesterday with elise and we got an awesome idea for clothes, school is pretty good except for spanish and me and henro are doing great. summer is coming and im starting my job and its really easy. i want to hang out with almina kristen and jessica sometime soon again. and im looking forward to getting these babies next week :

sweeeeeeet.

hello john

2005-04-03T16:05:52Z

so things are spectacular right now, spring break is here, im planning on doing my hair, free waffle house pie, burning sooo many cds, and just talking about everything. however, one thing that is NOT cool is me going to sleep early. what is wrong with me. oh well i cannot wait to go to miami on wednsday, even if it is just a business trip for one day. who cares! life is awesome.
<3lanie

cocaine

2005-03-23T04:39:56Z

i think everyone should invest in the velvet revolver cd.
and i love my best friend. the end!

im outta jail nigga, whatcha gotta say nowww

2005-03-18T21:14:27Z

tonight i am cleaning my house, going to the city, and partyiinnnggg! i am so exciteddddd! time for shots hahahahah, peaaacee!!!!!

ps: i found out i am secretly black

this shit is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S

2005-03-15T07:03:18Z

sometimes i wish i could just erase people from my life. im sick of everyone being so fake. im trying my best to be as real as i can right now. the internet is so lame nowadays. its like a tool to become the person you WISH you could be. this is so gross.

geek monster

2005-03-12T18:24:39Z

umm im bored and tired. and i failed geometry. if i cant find a 2nd class monday for this mini, im gonna drop out for 4th mini and work until next year begins. i want a baileys milkshake. mmmm peace out!